It occurs to me on occasion that my wedding is....MY wedding. OUR wedding.
I don't invite my friends to dinner every night and make sure I have something they like because A) I can't afford it, B) it might be kind of weird after a while, C) Maybe I want stuff I like. Right?
Our wedding shouldn't really be so much different. It should be the party we want to throw, that we can throw.
I don't really need to invite people just for the gesture. If they wanted to see me then they could come see me any time. At least for those far away types. Local folks...if I only see them at my wedding and rarely any other times, well then...how'd they get on the list anyway?
I have many friends who I don't see much. But we still communicate, we are still in touch, we still WANT to see each other but life gets in the way. It's ok. I don't hold it against people anymore. Some people put in more effort than others. Some people will always ask "how's the wedding planning going?" They're interested even if we don't sit down for coffee every week. I get it. This is how it goes with these things.
But do I want to feel obligated to invite people who will feel obligated to come? I don't want anybody to come just for the heck of it. That describes the reason I've attended most weddings I've ever been to, actually. And they were fun and I'm usually glad I went. Though I never get to see the person getting married because I'm not close enough with them to really care, or they have higher priority guests. I take it zero percent personally. They were kind enough to extend an invitation that I was happy to accept. Period.
I may have to amend my thinking for this party. On the one hand, we want it to be a big fun to-do because we'll do this once. On the other hand, we could/would/should? have as much fun with a small group and get together with other people at later times because then we can actually spend TIME with them.
I very much want some of my oldest, dearest, and far awayest friends to come to my wedding. But will I spend more than 10 minutes with them before they have to go? I have no idea.
Time is becoming a more important factor as I get older because I enjoy my time with certain people a whole lot and have less tolerance for wasting time on people who could take it or leave it.
This really isn't with anyone specific in mind; it's just an overall theme of late. It easily transfers over to the planning of the wedding. One excessive extravagant (for us) party or a whole boat load of smallish gatherings to celebrate our us-ness with those who love our us-ness? When I put it that way it's kind of a no brainer.
So....I gotta pee....and then I'll sleep on this topic and see what hatches.
Tell me this: if you had the choice would you rather come join us at a lively fiesta or a more casual gathering? Both are awesome, both are fun, both have their merits. What would you choose?
Love you all. Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments. Maybe you can help the hatching.
I don't invite my friends to dinner every night and make sure I have something they like because A) I can't afford it, B) it might be kind of weird after a while, C) Maybe I want stuff I like. Right?
Our wedding shouldn't really be so much different. It should be the party we want to throw, that we can throw.
I don't really need to invite people just for the gesture. If they wanted to see me then they could come see me any time. At least for those far away types. Local folks...if I only see them at my wedding and rarely any other times, well then...how'd they get on the list anyway?
I have many friends who I don't see much. But we still communicate, we are still in touch, we still WANT to see each other but life gets in the way. It's ok. I don't hold it against people anymore. Some people put in more effort than others. Some people will always ask "how's the wedding planning going?" They're interested even if we don't sit down for coffee every week. I get it. This is how it goes with these things.
But do I want to feel obligated to invite people who will feel obligated to come? I don't want anybody to come just for the heck of it. That describes the reason I've attended most weddings I've ever been to, actually. And they were fun and I'm usually glad I went. Though I never get to see the person getting married because I'm not close enough with them to really care, or they have higher priority guests. I take it zero percent personally. They were kind enough to extend an invitation that I was happy to accept. Period.
I may have to amend my thinking for this party. On the one hand, we want it to be a big fun to-do because we'll do this once. On the other hand, we could/would/should? have as much fun with a small group and get together with other people at later times because then we can actually spend TIME with them.
I very much want some of my oldest, dearest, and far awayest friends to come to my wedding. But will I spend more than 10 minutes with them before they have to go? I have no idea.
Time is becoming a more important factor as I get older because I enjoy my time with certain people a whole lot and have less tolerance for wasting time on people who could take it or leave it.
This really isn't with anyone specific in mind; it's just an overall theme of late. It easily transfers over to the planning of the wedding. One excessive extravagant (for us) party or a whole boat load of smallish gatherings to celebrate our us-ness with those who love our us-ness? When I put it that way it's kind of a no brainer.
So....I gotta pee....and then I'll sleep on this topic and see what hatches.
Tell me this: if you had the choice would you rather come join us at a lively fiesta or a more casual gathering? Both are awesome, both are fun, both have their merits. What would you choose?
Love you all. Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments. Maybe you can help the hatching.
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